Daily Ground – – -January 28
We are so unused to emotion that we mistake any depth of feeling for sadness, any sense of the unknown for fear, and any sense of peace for boredom – – -Mark Nepo
This past October, I walked out onto the deck with a cup of coffee and experienced the sun a little lower in the sky, the leaves dark red, and a chill in the air. It was beautiful. I recall feeling heavy hearted. Heavy. Grounded. Intense. I just sat there.
For a brief moment I mistook this feeling for depression or sadness. I had recently come out of several dark years and I was afraid the recent reprieve was over. As I continued to sit, I realized this was simply a feeling. A deep, intense feeling.
I’ve often been moved to tears by beauty. I’ve often felt heavy with strong emotion – even joy. So I sat and simply felt. I sat until I was okay with what I was feeling. I didn’t label myself dark or depressed or weird because of the way I experience beauty or love or pain or Autumn. Then I got up. I got another cup of coffee and began the day.